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Episode 18: Intermission

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Post by Zepher Sat Sep 05, 2009 4:14 am

Season 1
Episode 18
Intermission


Another meh episode, though I actually kind of like it, and it sets up a lot for the next few battles. And for those who are wondering, a Foreman is the leader of a mine, like the head digger.

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Next episode has centered text, and even better mist effects... I hope...

Andyways, I hope you're at least a little interested! Compliments wanted, critism needed! Thanks!

-Zepher


Last edited by Zepher on Fri Sep 11, 2009 12:04 am; edited 1 time in total
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Post by Awesome-o-saurus Sat Sep 05, 2009 8:43 am

I think it would have been more worth it to wait and combine the impending battle with this episode. Then again, who am I to talk, I'm known on MOCpages for leaving people hanging.
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Post by Sialboats Sat Sep 05, 2009 10:12 am

The ending three frames are very, very strong. It's nice to get the battle plan out in the open, and some time with Vintu and Shadowcloak out, but I'd also have liked to see something about the denizens of the world themselves, but that will likely have to wait.


Also, your fog is exemplary now! I told you you'd figure out a technique that works Wink .
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Post by The Jinja Ninja Sat Sep 05, 2009 12:55 pm

Let's all go to the lobby, let's all go to the lobby, let's all go to the lobby, get ourselves a snack...

Oh, not that kind of intermission? Alright...

Clone #48,365 wrote:So we're going after the core ships. Of course.
Logic really takes a back seat in this universe, doesn't it? Guys, you just said you can't take on the droid army, but now you're suddenly capable of storming core ships. If they were empty for some reason, I could buy that, but no such thing is ever mentioned. Actually, if they aren't deploying all their droid forces at once (as one of you pointed out), the core ships should be filled with reserves. If one of you dies poignantly on this mission, you'll be getting no sympathy from me.

Eyepatch guy wrote:This is foreman of the Zukla. He will be able to help you defend the bridge. He knows the area...
Firstly, bridge? What bridge? I don't recall hearing about a bridge on the way into this comic...

Secondly, whyyyyy are they sending the foreman? Surely it would make more sense to send a grunt rather than someone important? If he gets killed (likely, seeing as he's the only non-clone non-main character going on this mission), wouldn't that upset the running of the mine? Considering that mining is apparently the Zukla's only source of income (drugs planet, mining planet... howsabout a corporate accounting planet next?), it seems pretty stupid to endanger the wellbeing of the whole community when you could just send, I dunno, Rob the miner who nobody likes. They probably all know their way around as well as each other, seeing as how they live here.

Skullcape wrote:Why wait? We can rebuild him, we have the technology. Kill the Jedi now, we have the power.
I'm with you on this one, Scoutface.

Not Bib Fortuna wrote:You underestimate (yes, one word) them. They are powerful foes.
No they're not! White Helmet here just shot one point blank! (Yeah, she 'dodged', however the hell that works - I'm still not buying it.) Pull all your droid resources together, launch a massive assault on the mine base, and let Boneyparts here finish off the weaksauce Jedi. But no, I guess it's much sounder tactics to sit on your haunches (and droid reserves) while the Jedi and his redshirts infiltrate your ridiculously-easy-to-infiltrate base. Bravo. Maybe you'll get a job as majordomo at Jabba the Hutt's palace some day.

Clone #984,673,291 wrote:Sir! There's something coming! I can barely see it through the fog, but it looks...
*Dramatic pause*
Clone #984,673,291 wrote:...big.
Thank you. You are clearly the most observant of my men. I am so glad I put you on lookout duty.

C'mon, all you're getting from this...

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...is "big"? You really need a Jedi to tell you it's droids? You're fired.


So I thought this one was alright. Oh sure, it looks like I hate it, but that's just because it's more fun to write about the stuff you do wrong than the stuff you do right. Insane logic aside, it's a decent lead-in to a battle (one that you've probably put more thought into than the lead-in), if not particularly good by itself. At least you're not using ejaculate as camouflage.
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Post by Ham701 Sat Sep 05, 2009 1:52 pm

How did all of the clones die on one side and the droids on another? And also, very classic brickfilming noob plot line- Attack of the MTT! Oh s**t the clones are getting it now. And I mean it. Without armor support, make the clones LOSE next comic. Have Mr. Big MTT smah through the walls after having deployed the battle droids outside, and make the droids WIN for once. And I'm pretty sure Jedi can't deflect that amount of fire power.

That would make up for the mistakes stated by Jinja.
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Post by Sialboats Sat Sep 05, 2009 2:04 pm

Ham701 wrote:How did all of the clones die on one side and the droids on another?

Er, lets see. They either: Swept that path clean of corpses and debris, fought in neat orderly battle lines, had a artillery shell burst right between their charges at one another....

It's not that hard to come up with ideas.


And also, very classic brickfilming noob plot line- Attack of the MTT! Oh s**t the clones are getting it now. And I mean it.

I'm sure that Zeph isn't stupid enough to have an MTT be the bulk of the Confederate attack, using that cliched "wall-breaking" device to cause a sense of desperation. To imply so is a insult to him and his intelligence.


Without armor support, make the clones LOSE next comic. Have Mr. Big MTT smah through the walls after having deployed the battle droids outside, and make the droids WIN for once. And I'm pretty sure Jedi can't deflect that amount of fire power.

Why lose? Why win? What's with this dichotomy of victory or defeat? Isn't this in a city? So what if they breach the walls, they still have to fight for the town block for block. Any victory at the walls is marginal at best Wink . I agree with you in letting the Seps gain some ground, but making it out to be a definitive success is foolish Razz .

That would make up for the mistakes stated by Jinja.

They aren't really mistakes, as they are minor plot holes. It's real easy to poke holes in arguments, and media, and papers. I do that in my sleep and make many lose theirs over it Razz . It isn't as easy for me to run a sharp stick through something like this - which I know from first hand experience is a great challenge to develop. That said, I don't think they need "made up", just "smoothed out" Wink .

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Post by The Jinja Ninja Sat Sep 05, 2009 2:29 pm

Sialboats wrote:
Ham701 wrote:And also, very classic brickfilming noob plot line- Attack of the MTT! Oh s**t the clones are getting it now. And I mean it.
I'm sure that Zeph isn't stupid enough to have an MTT be the bulk of the Confederate attack, using that cliched "wall-breaking" device to cause a sense of desperation. To imply so is a insult to him and his intelligence.
Right now, Zeph is glaring at his screen and crushing the mouse in frustration that he has to start all over again. Wink
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Post by Zepher Sat Sep 05, 2009 3:40 pm

Ham701 wrote:How did all of the clones die on one side and the droids on another? And also, very classic brickfilming noob plot line- Attack of the MTT! Oh s**t the clones are getting it now. And I mean it. Without armor support, make the clones LOSE next comic. Have Mr. Big MTT smah through the walls after having deployed the battle droids outside, and make the droids WIN for once. And I'm pretty sure Jedi can't deflect that amount of fire power.

That would make up for the mistakes stated by Jinja.

Wait until the next episode, and all your prayers will be answered.

Thanks for the feedback Jinja. Some of your questions are fair enough, others are meant to look stupid now, but actually make sense later in the comics. Maybe nort perfect sense, but more sense then they do right now!

By the way, I love that you write feedack that I'm able to laugh at! Thanks for your expert views!

I actually have the next episode one! Should I release it now, do you think?
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