541st Vendetta #3: Pharple Little

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Okay, last bit of the exposition, and the next comic (which is actually almost done) will be up sometime next week, maybe even by the end of this weekend if I feel like it ! Kudos to Zeph for inspiring me to improve his shake effect . A little soft-glow goes a long way .

(By the way, a Pharple is a Star Wars chicken/turkey...)

Very nice, the R5 unit was ingenius, but in a couple places, I think you forgot your speech bubble placing.

Few things!

First off, the effects are awesome! The shaking was good, and the lights were well done!

Secondly, the enviroment of this planet is so plesently created, it's incredible! The warm feel of the tan and the lighting effects are fantastic! So good work!

Story wise ist was goo. I loved the talking civilains in the beginning, and the hanging for the red head (name?) and Trek is cool! I like the battle forming up.

The strongest choice you made so far, story-wise, in this arc is the sister. She creates a very interesting side. She first exposes Ied to the real world, and then give Turikai a family, which would be impossible with a Jedi, so your really using her well, as well as the fact that he's not a Jedi.

I also like the character amounts. Trek is a good intro'd character. Add that two the three generals, plus that space battle (can't remember the guys name) and you've finally got a good sized cast for me!

The natural lighting that you use is both a positive and a negative Sial.
It makes the comic seem more real, but then again, some of the pics don't look so great.

Overall, it's a great comic. With an interesting story, great Purist figs, and amazing FX.
But this one is definitely not one of your best, but that's just my opinion of course. (;

-Fix, who can't believe he's critiquing creations again; I've avoided if for far too long.
Or maybe, I was just waiting for the most opportune moment, hmm... XP

And is the red haired girl gonna stay with the 541st until Order 66?

But anyhow, like others said, the set is very nice, has some MOC feeling to it, rather than a carpet and a couple baseplates, which is why I'm MUCH more excited for Vendetta, and all of your next Comics to come.

Though I'm hoping you'll continue an arc with McCulburt, or whatever his name was, because you can't just show him in 1 comic, then forget about him.

great job! I really like the crash scene, could we get a better look at that Commando though?

Nice comic, I really like the ODC.

I'm suprised that nobody has picked up on my Mod Election snippet....

Where's the figting? The explosions? AAARGH!

Still a nice comic.

Mod snippet? Was it the poorly executed play on Zepher's name, St. Rephez?

80-0 wrote:Mod snippet? Was it the poorly executed play on Zepher's name, St. Rephez?

Nope....

DarthPineapple wrote:Where's the figting? The explosions? AAARGH!

Still a nice comic.

Coming next comic!

Well, the explosions aren't normal, because if you've ever seen a building be hit by something non-explosive, the blast isn't firey...

Okay. His post gets a reply, but all the really long and indepth ones don't?

I find that funny though. nice catch 80-0. So close to a personal shout-out. So very very close.

Got it, Senator Jinja is doing well in the Election for MOD on CABG.

Not bad.

Zepher wrote:Okay. His post gets a reply, but all the really long and indepth ones don't?

Sorry... but I didn't see where I could reply to yours .

Alpha wrote:Got it, Senator Jinja is doing well in the Election for MOD on CABG!

Not bad.

Winnar .

Someone is voting for Jinja... secretly.

Ah! I just caught that! So now we apparently know where Sialboats' loyalties lie...

Sialboats wrote:

Zepher wrote:Okay. His post gets a reply, but all the really long and indepth ones don't?

Sorry... but I didn't see where I could reply to yours .

Alpha wrote:Got it, Senator Jinja is doing well in the Election for MOD on CABG!

Not bad.

Winnar .

I was teasing you.

And nicely played Sials. Very nicely played. I was trying to figure out why the Senator had such a wierd name, and why you threw that in at all

Well, all good battles have good build ups, excluding the battle of the Ionian Nebula in BSG... Just popped out of no where, and was awesome. Anyways, good work. Looking forward to the next one, maybe I'll go work on my own now...

Zepher wrote:

And nicely played Sials. Very nicely played. I was trying to figure out why the Senator had such a wierd name, and why you threw that in at all

Why thank you . I was hoping that the obtrusive nature of it would have clued someone in .





Hmmm... I just noticed something. Note the absence of "DOODZ THATS AWESOMES". I think the noobs must hate me . Rarely do newer members reply in these comics .

Where all the other comics are all "OZ! Mannnn! I likzd the prts when ther r clones bcuse they iz cul, right?"

I have two final compliments:

The name is fantastic in this one. I don't know if anyone else caught the play, but Chicken Little is about the sky falling, and in this one the assualt came from the sky. The title was super fantastic (and possibly one of my favorite parts of this comic, certainly the best title so far)


I don't remember my other one. So just assume that it's really well done....

EDIT: Ah! i remember now! The dust after the explosion with the light through it was really kick A**!

Zepher wrote:The name is fantastic in this one. I don't know if anyone else caught the play...

Come on, Chris, how stupid do you think we are? It's a simple pun, and it would be weird if we didn't get it.

Anyway... Yeah, good comic again, Sial. Not a lot in the way of 'new' - we knew the merc chick was going to attack Turaki, and loe and behold, the merc chick attacked Turaki. Try throwing in a plot twist here and there, or keep it fresh some other way. 'Cause as much as you want to call this 'plot development', all you've done is introduce a token female (Alexis) and a clone with a different name before things start explodng again. The History teaser was good, because it actually gave us new information and an interesting plot hook. However, it's gone a bit stale now, as we know everyone's motive and we know the next few strips will be clones and mercs blowing each other up. Perhaps you should have revealed the backstory gradually through flashbacks, like you did with Mira in Chronicles. It might have seemed a little repetitive for people who read the last series, but it would have kept some of the tension going throughout the series. Still, too late now. Maybe you could throw in a subplot with a minor character or two - perhaps have Turaki fighting while Ied does something interesting for a change? Or use the new clone as more than just another grunt who dies at the end and we feel sorry for. Do whatever you want, as long as it adds some flavour and depth to the story.

Oh, and thanks for the support.

Really great comic! I agree with all of the positive things that have been said.

Hot tip: Get a clean brush to get hair and or dust off your sets.

I don't think your stupid.

The rest of them...

Still waiting for your comment on my newest one Jinj.

The Jinja Ninja wrote:

Zepher wrote:The name is fantastic in this one. I don't know if anyone else caught the play...

Come on, Chris, how stupid do you think we are? It's a simple pun, and it would be weird if we didn't get it.

Anyway... Yeah, good comic again, Sial. Not a lot in the way of 'new' - we knew the merc chick was going to attack Turaki, and loe and behold, the merc chick attacked Turaki. Try throwing in a plot twist here and there, or keep it fresh some other way. 'Cause as much as you want to call this 'plot development', all you've done is introduce a token female (Alexis) and a clone with a different name before things start explodng again. The History teaser was good, because it actually gave us new information and an interesting plot hook. However, it's gone a bit stale now, as we know everyone's motive and we know the next few strips will be clones and mercs blowing each other up. Perhaps you should have revealed the backstory gradually through flashbacks, like you did with Mira in Chronicles. It might have seemed a little repetitive for people who read the last series, but it would have kept some of the tension going throughout the series. Still, too late now. Maybe you could throw in a subplot with a minor character or two - perhaps have Turaki fighting while Ied does something interesting for a change? Or use the new clone as more than just another grunt who dies at the end and we feel sorry for. Do whatever you want, as long as it adds some flavour and depth to the story.

Oh, and thanks for the support.

I think you'll be somewhat pleased with the subsequent comic then, as I'm navagating away from the 541st and getting a different perspective. The thing is though, you're right, we know everyone's intention. Merc chick (I like that ) wants Turaki dead, Ansion leveled, and the 541st toasted. This isn't 24, for example, where every two seconds the plot changes entirely, I'll concede you that. But, I do understand what yer asking for, and I'll do my best to introduce some changes to the plot and the intentions of the characters. Not to mention some completely unexpected moves every once and a while to keep the reader on their toes.

Thanks for the input! I like posts like these because they tell me what more I can do than trying to outshine everyone with GIMP .

Exactly what I need in my comics! Woot for thread high jacking!

I agree with Jinja.

Also, what is the Red Head's name? She really really needs one.

Also... is this like my fourth or fith post on this one comic? Yes.